The sky turned red, killer sillouhettes ran rampant, and people were being plucked from their home times and dimensions and tossed all over—it was the Crisis, or, as those of us in Earth-Prime knew it, DC's maxiseries
Crisis on Infinite Earths. Many big, important, unimagniable things occurred during that event, but perhaps none so unexpected as newlyweds Johnny Quick and Liberty Belle having sex in Billy Batson's bed.
The sordid tale was told in 1985's
All-Star Squadron #52, by Roy Thomas, Dann Thomas, Arvell Jones and Alfredo Alcalla.
Green Lantern Alan Scott, Johnny Quick and Liberty Belle from Earth-2 follow their friend Firebrand II into a hole in the sky or something, and end up on Earth-S, where they find Captain Marvel engaged in battle against the shadow things.
After the new heroes help turn the tide, sending the shadow things back to their own maxiseries, they do a little meet and greet, and Alan pulls Cap aside and lets him know exaclty what's up Johhny Quick's ass.
They head for a diner, where the Earth-2 heroes are totally dissed by a young autograph hound. Libby, feeling tired, bored or perhaps just horny, issues a yawn, signaling that this team-up has gone on long enough for her tastes.
Cap takes them to Billy's apartment which is—wow, Billy has a nice pad!
Man, that's much nicer than my apartment. I guess there's some pretty decent money in being a boy broadcaster!
Cap and GL leave the newlyweds to get some sleep, while they head off to do actual superhero stuff. Mainly flying around to see if the green meteor that crashed in Earth-2, and from which Alan's Lantern was formed, also crashed on Earth-S, since he could use a recharge.
But what's this? Libby's not so tired after all!
The next time we see the young couple is this charming scene:
...freaking Billy Batson with his king-sized bed...I'm a
thirty-year-old man and I've
never had a king-sized bed...
Now, what's weird about this scene is that not only did Libby and Johnny avail themselves of Batson's generosity and then totally consumated their marriage in his bed, but Libby also helped herself to the kid's wardrobe, and slept in one of his trademarked longsleeved shirts. She's wearing it the next morning, which is the internationally recognized signal of I've Just Slept With This Shirt's Owner.
Man, they are some terrible house guests. They sleep in his bed, they do it in his bed, they wear his clothes...could it get any worse?
Oh yeah, Libby could accuse him of being a voyeur trying to sneak a peek at them because he happens to be outside the window of his own apartment.
The nerve of some people.
Man, I sure hope Billy changed those sheets...
