Stream-of-Consciousness Reveiw: Justice Society of America #1

Cover: This issue shipped with two covers, as the law apparently decrees all #1 issues from New York City-based comic book publisherst must. The standard one was a gorgeous team portrait painted by Alex Ross, featuring 17 heroes seated around a marble round table in a pose evoking the original, Golden Age images of the JSA, but with an incredible amount of photorealism in the image. Just take a gander at the expressions on the faces of the Flash and Cyclone; they look like real people posing for a family photo, not superheroes posing for a comic book cover. Why on Earth would anyone want the Dale Eaglesham variant? (That's it above). It’s a nice drawing and all, but come on, the Ross piece is a work of freaking art! Plus, it's worth noting the Ross version is an iconic or symbolic image, while the Eaglesham one is a "story-telling" cover, but the story it's telling is inaccurate—those characters don't pore over candiates in this issue. Page 1: Here we have a splash of the “One Year Later” Society (the one featured in the Paul Levitz arc that closed out JSA), rushing through a city in flames, with the caption reading simply “World War III.” Looks like Black Adam’s coalition building early on in 52 ended up having some serious impact on global politics after all… Page 2: The caption reads “Three months later,” so if you’re making a timeline, this would be about three months after “One Year Later.” The “Trinity” of Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman approach Wildcat, Green Lantern Alan Scott and Flash Jay Garrick with a pitch, “The world needs better good guys. So what can the League do to help?” In just five panels, Geoff Johns manages to delineate the differences between the League and the Society and give the latter a bold new mission statement. Page 3: Someone in a cape is narrating the hell out of a crime scene. He seems to think it’s still 1989, based on his Rorschach-esque, Dark Knight-ish narration and penchant for violence. Page 4: Well, didn’t see that coming! Ladies and gentleman, Mr. America, wearing a pencil thin moustache that looks even more dated than his costume! Who the hell is Mr. America, you ask? Go read James Robinson’s excellent Elseworlds story The Golden Age. Yeah, it’s out of continuity, but it’s the best—and maybe only—Mr. America story you’re going to find these days. Actually, judging from his name, “Trey Thompson,” this is the original Mr. America’s son or grandson, since the original was “Tex Thompson.” Hmm, wonder what “Tex” is short for? Page 6-7: A double page spread of Alan Scott pinning glossies of members of the new JSA on a bulletin board. Note the ring on his finger; penciller Dale Eaglesham manages to draw it in the correct shape, something Paul Gulacy never did in the Vandal Savage/Green Lantern arc of JSA: Classified. Eaglesham draws the hell out of the team here, packing an awful lot of individual personality into pretty standard superheroes. The text boxes, presumably provided from an omniscient narrator rather than Mr. America or Wildcat, who have been switching narration back and forth, identifies each of the six heroes shown here, and their powers. The intros are rather cheesy, like “Mr. Terriffic—Michael Holt. The third smartest man in the world.” Really? Third? That’s pretty specific. Page 8: Alan, Jay and Wildcat sit around a nice marble table with nice, new patriotic chairs, looking at a bunch of photos. Yes! Photo time! There’s nothing more thrilling about the foundation of a new DC super-team than the time spent looking at photos! In Brad Meltzer’s Justice League of America, the Trinity have been looking at headshots of superheroes for four whole issues. In Johns’ Teen Titans, we got a tantalizing two-page spread of a bunch of Titans from the “missing year.” Even in Birds of Prey, Oracle pored over photos when considering how to replace Black Canary. Now, let’s flip this book over, break out the magnifying glass, and see who they’re considering. Some are hard to make out, but at the very least, we definitely have Catman, the Manhattan Guardian, Hawkman, Black Canary, Sand, Mr. America, S.T.R.I.P.E., Green Arrow Oliver Queen, Obsidian, Damage, Jakeem and the Thunderbolt, Captain Marvel, Obsidian in Shadow Form (I’m not even gonna ask how you photograph something made out of shadow), Zauriel, Skyrocket, Firestorm II, Blue Beetle III, Ragman and Nightwing. Some of these will make the team, based on the cover, and some of them would definitely fit in, since they have Golden Age legacies, and some of them are just plain way out of left field, like Catman, Zauriel and Green Arrow. I assume Johns just asked Eaglesham to draw whoever he felt like. Page 9: Four horizontal panels, each focusing on a moment of JSA history. First, we have the original line up seated around a table. Then we have a scene from—Hey, what the hell? That’s Dick Grayson, Robin from Earth-2 standing between Star Spangled Kid and Power Girl! What the hell?! The grown-up Robin was erased from continuity in Crisis on Infinite Earths! The recent Infinite Crisis brought Earth-2 back, sort of, but only in the memories of Power Girl, Kal-L and Earth-2 Lois Lane. In Infinite Crisis #7, Wildcat mentions memories of Earth-2 returning to him, but DC changed that when they published IC as a hardcover collection. What gives?! Anyway, below that we have the cover of JSA #1, and then the foundation of this team, with Wildcat pouting about having to pick a lineup and read files. Page 10: Okay, there’s only four panels on this page, but a lot to talk abut. Let’s look at the first panel first. Check out Wildcat’s back. Holy crap, right? That’s one powerful looking back. Now, note Alan Scott’s right hand…it’s entirely composed of cocktail wieners. While we’re on Alan, check out his eyes in the first two panels. He lost an eye in 52, and it was established that when he’s in his civilian identity, he wore a patch over his left eye, but when he was suited up as Green Lantern, the missing eye glowed green, the emerald flame apparently filling the socket. In the first panel, one socket is full of a glowing green eye, and the other is empty. In the second panel, he has both eyes back. Come on Eaglesham, you were doing so well! Oh no, and now look what you’ve done in panel 2—Alan’s ring reverted to a Green Lantern Corps ring, rather than the lantern-shaped one you correctly drew earlier. Tch tch tch. As the elder statesmen chat, it comes out that the JLA spent weeks gathering all of this intel for them to pore over, so presumably those glossies are on loan from Batman’s private stash of superhero headshots (last seen in JLoA #0-#3). Finally, in the fourth panel, we get a close up of Wildcat’s face. His costume looks hilariously dirty and amateurishly stitched together here. I really like the implication that this eightysomething former boxer not only made his own cat suit, but does all his own sewing, even though he’s not terribly good at it. Page 11: Do you know the sound of one super-powered guy knocking a brick wall down with another super-powered guy’s face? No? It’s “CHOOOOOMM.” Someone wearing stars and stripes with a do-rag over his masked and hooded head and a tank top over his costume pushes New Look Damage through a wall. Page 12-13: The super guy who’s not Damage is apparently named “Rebel” and based on his comment that “I rule these streets…and I’ll wash them clean of the color that’s destroyed them,” I guess we’re supposed to assume he’s wearing a full body suit shaped like the old Confederate flag. Which raises some questions. Like, why would someone proud enough of the stars and bars to wear them then completely cover them up in shorts, a tank top and bandanna? That’s like wearing a disguise over your costume. And what the hell he’s doing in Philadelphia? That’s hardly the place for a racist “The South will rise again!” style vigilante. Rebel breaks Damage’s right arm—I think; it goes “KRAKK”—and then whispers in his ear that he heard that upon being beaten into a bloody mess and having his face destroyed, Damage “cried like a bitch.” Hoo boy. Okay, first of all, in Damage’s defense, if there’s ever a time when a man can cry, certainly it’s after his face has been destroyed and he’s been beaten into a bloody mess, no? Second, in this last panel, being called a “bitch” doesn’t sit well with Damage, as you can tell from the determined look on his face and the fact that his eyes start glowing. Then, on page 13, it’s apparently enough to rally Damage, as he blows up Rebel’s knee and teeth. So, while we can forgive Johns for using the word “bitch,” and in so derisive a fashion, because it’s not Johns who said it, it was the bad guy, we can’t so easily forgive him for depicting it having such an effect on Damage. Clearly, being called a “bitch” is just too much for Damage who, readers of The Titans know, was once sexually abused. Sigh. (On a more lighthearted note, check out the 52 joke in the background). Page 14: But wait, what’s this? The misogynistic use of a sexist swear word in this all-ages DCU title isn’t over yet! As his fallen foe cries in pain, Damage leans into his ear and tells him, “Now who’s crying like a bitch?” And the soul of the comic book industry dies a little more. Page 15-16: Liberty Belle and Hourman appear to recruit Damage, who’s doing the same sulky, angsty teenager routine he used to pull in his own long-cancelled monthly title and in Titans, but now it’s been amped up to 11. Page 16, which shows why Damage decides to join up, is pretty funny, and well handled by Eaglesham. This guy can sure draw. Page 20: And speaking of drawing. In one four-panel page, Eaglesham introduces us to Maxine Hunkel and completely defines her personality. The following four pages only build on it, but Eaglesham has done more in those first four panels than all the dialogue on these pages does. Make sure you read the text-filled panel…it actually makes sense and is worth the read. Page 25-30: Presenting Starman VIII, or whatever he is—I honestly lost count. James Robinson so perfectly told the tale of the Starmen in his since concluded Starman monthly that there seemed to be little point in introducing a new Starman, this one wearing the costume design of the one in Alex Ross’ Kingdom Come miniseries, but I gotta hand it to Johns and Eaglesham. I did not see this take on the character coming. Some of his speech seems way too Hollywood, but what the hell, it’s a fun and funny depiction. I love how he dances into his sanitarium home, and the little details Eaglesham packs these scenes with (Check out the birthday celebration in the background). Page 31: We get a good look at the new JSA building, and it’s pretty sweet… I dig the stone eagles instead of lions at the front porch. Ma Hunkle, who seems to have lost weight, namedrops two Green Lanterns, and we get a glimpse of Obsidian. Page 32-33: And look at that, there’s the whole lineup assembled, minus the three originals JSAers. And it only took 32 pages. Brian Michael Bendis and Brad Meltzer could learn a thing or two about super-team assemblage from Johns. Page 34-37: Annnd, Johns drops not one but two bombs on us, as a beaten and bloody Mr. America crashes onto the team’s meeting table, and Jay and Alan point Wildcat to a young dark-haired boy about to light up a cigarette and tell him, “His name is Tom. He’s your son.” (Please don’t name him Tomcat, please don’t name him Tomcat, please don’t name him Tomcat…) Page 38: A full-page next issue box, completely with four panels under the words, “Coming this year in Justice Society of America.” In panel one, we have Batman, Sandman and Starman and a fourth, unidentified hero standing infront of Arkham Asylum. The unidentified guy says, “I’ll notify the League,” but who the hell is he? I don’t know, but he has one of those weird masks that cover the whole head except for the hair, like Gambit and Cyclops wear in the next universe over. In the DCU, that can only be, let’s see, Geo-Force, Animal Man, Gunfire, Kid Flash, a couple of the Manhunters. Based on the hair color, costume color and lack of a jacket or shoulder pads, though, it can only be Geo-Force. The second panel has the right arm of Dawnstar from a previous iteration of the Legion, saying “I hvae to go track down Starman.” Panel three, the hand of Kal-L, Earth-2’s Superman, breaking out of his grave in front of a stunned Power Girl. And, in panel four, an Alex Ross painting of someone who looks like Kal-L saying “It never ends—for people like us.” But check out the color of the field behind his “S;” it’s black, meaning that’s the Kingdom Come Superman. Hmm…

Stream-of-Consciousness Review: Civil War #5

Cover: This scene, cool as it is, doesn’t actually occur within the book, although Spider-Man does run afoul of some of the new Thunderbolts, and there is a flaming jack o’ lantern involved. Pages 1-2: The Storms, currently on the run from their husband and brother-in-law Reed “Mr. Fantastic” Richards, are being pursued by SHIELD agents, whho, we’re told, have flooded the streets of New York City with all their crazy hoverbikes, helicopters and tank thingees (What, no flying convertibles? I thought all SHIELD had was helicarriers and flying convertibles?) Page 3: Outside Stark Tower, former Defenders LVP Nighthawk and Young Avenger Stature are meeting with Happy Hogan, about to make good on their promise to defect from the Anti-Reg side last issue. This third panel is a great example of why Steve McnNiven, Dexter Vines and Morry Hollowell are and unfuckwithable art team. Tell me that’s not the absolute coolest Nighthawk’s ever looked. And yet, this page is the first time in the series I’ve really felt let down by McNiven. Check out all those passersby. Yeah, they’re New Yorkers, but they’re not even glancing at these two masked super-people. Weren’t we lead to believe that the United States was in the grip of some anti-superhero hysteria that resulted in the Registration Act? These civilians aren’t even phased by seeing super-people, which seems a little odd. Nighthawk’s rationale for changing sides doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, either. “We’re living in a different world now, sir. I guess it took Goliath to make me realize that,” he says. Yeahbuwha? It took the Pro-Reg side unleashing a killer clone of Thor to blow a whole in Goliath to make you realize you should be on the side of the people blowing the holes into people, not the side getting holes blown into them? So, is ‘hawk just a big coward or what? Well, maybe he and Cassie are just trying to infiltrate the Pro-Regs….Page 4: If you haven’t been reading Amazing Spider-Man, this scene picks up right after ASM#535, which ended with Iron Man flying through six walls of his own building to flying tackle Spider-Man because he heard Spidey tell Aunt May and MJ, “I realize I’ve been on the wrong side.” And what are Iron Man’s first words to Spidey afterwards, according to this scene? “Peter, you’re acting like a lunatic. Why can’t we just sit down and discuss this like grown-ups?” Iron Man also says of the Negative Zone detention camp that it’s “only a temporary measure,” whereas he told Peter that it was permanent in ASM (or permanent until the detainees decide to sign on the dotted line). Page 5: Iron Man makes an argument I wish he would have made earlier—essentially saying it’s this lousy status quo, or an even worse one—but he takes it a bit too far by mentioning May and MJ. It didn’t sound all that threatening to me, but Spider-Man must have though so, as he puts Iron Man through a wall over it. Page 6: Tony breaks out the repulsor rays, and we get a nice display of spider agility. Odd that Iron Man has to shoot rays at Spidey though, isn’t it? I mean, he built that “Iron Spidey” suit, and he didn’t include some kind of failsafe device in it? Stark kept a hair of Thor’s from their very first meeting just in case he ever needed to clone him, and yet he didn’t think to put a failsafe of some sort into Spidey’s costume? I do hope Iron Man has a means of tracking the costume, otherwise I’ll lose respect for his scheming abilities. Page 7: Avengers Tower has reinforced glass strong enough to stop men in metal spider costumes from jumping through it, but not stong enough to stop men in metal spider costumes being shot through it by a barrage of bullets, as the SHIELD capekillers demonstrate when they come in guns blazing. Page 8: Okay, here’s the second time this issue in which McNiven lets me down, the second panel, which shows us the Thunderbolts. So, what, they’re all just standing around a huge empty room in their costumes posing, waiting to be activated? Page 9-10: The Jester and Jack O’ Lantern are the first to find Spidey, and they come in with yo-yos and gas pellets blazing. Page 11: Did I mention how awesome this art team is? I know I pointed out a few panels where they didn’t seem to think the psychology of the crowds through very well, but man, just look how totally bad-ass Jack O’ Lantern is. Even The Jester looks really cool. Man I could really get used to these villains; they seem pretty cool here. I hope we see more of them in the future. Page 12: Oh, so that’s why two such relatively low-level villains were grouped with the A-List villains on the last panel of Civil War #4. I admit I laughed aloud when I saw Jack’s head smashing, and the pumpkin goop shooting out the exit wound, but, um, that means his head was really a flaming pumpkin? I guess I should look him up on Marvel.com, but I was fairly certain that was just some kind of mask, and that he was a human being in a costume. Guess not. Good news for Jester, it looks like his headshot was just a glancing blow. He might live to throw exploding yo-yos another day. Mark Millar is playing coy with who Spidey’s savior is in this scene so far, with Spidey referring to him as “Skull-face guy” and seeing his chest emblem through a cloud of hallucinogen, but the Michael Turner variant cover has already spilled the beans: It’s The Punisher. Now, what I want to know is, how did he keep those white boots so white while running around the sewer? Page 13: I’m glad Johnny and Sue said it in panel 3, because I started thinking it as soon as I read it in panel 2. By panel four, we’re inside "Captain America’s New HQ”, and we get a look at an Anti-Reg meeting. I have no idea who some of these people are, like the lady talking (a Hero For Hire, right?), or the two women on the far left hand side of the panel. Little help here...?Page 14: Some tantalizing bits of foreshadowing, as Cap talks strategy with his team. Page 15: Okay, now his boots are dirty. Thankfully, it’s just Spider-Man’s blood staining them and not, you know, the other sort of stains one can expect to pick up while stalking the sewers. If he’d just wear black boots, he could avoid this whole problem. Page 16: Some more costumes I don’t recognize, but Punisher seems to, or at least he recognized Ultra Girl. Falcon’s not happy to see Punisher there, and says so: “Since when were you on this team, Punisher?” (No, I don’t know why he didn’t say “Castle” either). Punny responds, “Sine the other guys started enlisting known thieves and multiple killers.” Wait, Punisher spends his time punishing “known thieves?” I thought he was more of an organized crime/drug trade/murderer-oriented vigilante. Page 17: Nope, no idea who that guy with the red and white arrow motif going on is. “Who do you figure’s been running around in a ski mask and covering your backs these past few weeks?” Punisher says, implying that the answer is him. That’s right, Ski Mask Guy is actually…the Punisher? Of all the Big Dumb Moments in “Civil War” so far, this is by far the Biggest and Dumbest. The Punisher was wearing a disguise? He was wearing a ski mask? What on earth for? The Punisher has been breaking laws throughout his entire vigilante career—the dude’s whole M.O. is that he runs around the city avoiding the cops and putting bullets in the heads of bad guys, murdering them. And he’s never done it in a ski mask until Civil War #4 . Why on earth would he be wearing a ski mask then? Is he suddenly afraid that he might be recognized now that the Registration Act has gone into effect? He had no compunctions about breaking all those other laws and doing so without a mask or attempting to conceal his identity, but he’s afraid SHIELD will bust him for running around in a costume murdering people? What the fuck?! It's not the mass murder charges that scare Punishr, it's the SHRA violation? Oh Man, if I think about the Punisher suddently starting to wear a ski mask to conceal his identity for one more second my head will explode like Jack O’ Lantern’s…Okay, let’s pretend that panel didn’t exist and that there never was a Ski Mask Man. Let's just move on to the next panel. What do we have here? Oh, it’s Punisher telling the Anti-Regs that only he has the black ops training necessary to get them into the Baxter Building. Not Captain America, who’s been doing the same shit Punisher’s been doing, only on a grander scale, for even longer, but only the Punisher. Hmm, I wonder if Invisible Woman and the Human Torch, who have lived in the Baxter Building for years, wouldn’t be able to pull that off better than the Punisher? But wait, the craziness of this page isn’t over yet! In the last panel, we see Tigra hiding in the corner, using a Stark-brand cell phone. Since the last time we saw her, she was on Stark’s side, I guess we’re to assume that she simply infiltrated the base, rather than pretended to defect to spy on them for Stark. But what strikes me as even weirder is her tool—a cell phone. Stark, Reed Richards and Hank Pym can build a Negative Zone prison, Thuderbolt-controlling nanites and so on, but the best spy tech they could come up with is a cell phone? I’d ask where Tigra keeps her cell phone when she’s not using it, but I don’t want our discussion to go there. Page 18: Meanwhile, in Hell’s Kitchen, it looks like Daredevil got busted. Hopefully She-Hulk and Mr. Fantastic helped take him down, because if SHIELD did it without their help, DD went out like a punk—or did he allow himself to be captured to free the prisoners from the Negative Zone Guantanamo they’re being kept in? Shulkie rearticulates Iron Man’s argument from earlier on in the book to Reed, who seems pretty bummed out. Page 19: Tony Stark, wearing a suit and tie instead of his armor, talks to DD as he’s being frog-marched into the Negative Zone, essentially asking him to join his side, and dangling his very own super-team in front of Dardevil. Pages 20-21: A two-page spread of the N-Zone facility. I’d prefer not to think about this too long, as I’ll get that same annoying itch in the back of my head that occurs whenever I think too long about the Death Star in Star Wars, regarding who the hell actually builds things this big, and how they do it…Page 22: Daredevil gives Tony his answer. As the Internet might say, “Pwned!”

Stream-of-Consciousness Review: Justice League of America #3

Cover: I realize there are technically two or three or six covers for this issue, because we wouldn’t know if we should bother buying it or not were there fewer than two covers for it, but I’m only going to discuss the one that was on the comic book that my local comic shop’s proprietor handed to me from my pull file, the Michael Turner one. It’s a fairly striking image, what with the crowd of Yellow, Blue, Orange and Green Tornados standing behind Red Tornado. It becomes a lot less striking, however, when you consider the fact that Turnder apparently only drew two to three of these Tornados, and then cloned the rest with some sort of computer witchcraft. But what’s irritating about the cover image is that it doesn’t reflect the interior of the book at all. As we saw last issue, and as is reinforced this issue, there’s, like, maybe a dozen or two Tornados protecting Ivo’s lab. Not scores. So the cover isn’t terribly accurate, and I wonder how much more striking it would have been was it a better drawing of just a half-dozen or so Tornados of various colors. Ah well. Further crapifying (is that a word?) the cover is the blurb: “Tornado Outbreak!” I always cringe when I see one of these pun cover blurbs on a DC Comic. I know from experience they could be much worse than “Tornado Outbreak!”, but still… Page 1: Trident and Dr. Impossible face down Jefferson Pierce, who’s so busy monologue-ing he doesn’t notice their true target…Page 2:…Superman villain Parasite, redesigned by penciller Ed Benes to resemble a fatter version of the Superman: The Animated Series version of the character. Pierce continues his narration, spending a color-coded narration box or two recapping the events of the last two issues. See, this is something I don’t get. Brad Meltzer is pacing this first story like a graphic novel; this is something derisively referred to as “writing for the trade” or more derisively referred to as “decompression.” I have no problem with it per se, as long as the story moves forward a little each month, but if you’re going to take your sweet time getting from point A (there is no Justice League currently, and Professor Ivo, Dr. Impossible and some mystery villains are up to no good) to point B (there is a Justice League again and the villains’ nefarious plot is stopped), then commit to taking your sweet time and forget about half measures like this complete recap of the Pierce plot. If you’re writing the story for the trade, write it for the trade. This catch-up bit might be helpful to readers who forgot the last two issues over the last month or two, but this recap will also be appearing on page 45 or so of a 140-page trade, and it’s going to break the whole thing up there. Maybe DC can axe it in the trade collection… Anyway, Pierce powers up, and tells us what Trident’s trident can do, which I’m glad of, because I’ve never heard of the guy. Page 3: In the first panel, we get a close up of Pierce’s eyes emitting electricity, and he quips about Trident’s trident. Cool. The next panel, however, Trident stutters “W-What’re you doin’?”, but Pierce isn’t doing anything. Shouldn’t the trident be shaking or emitting a weird sound or glowing or something? In the next panel, Pierce shoots at the trident, by making an, um, gun-shape out of his right hand. So, he wasn’t doing anything last panel? He then uses his fists to sort out the guy who went and put on a trident-shaped mask just to make sure everyone knew he wasn’t named after the brand of gum. Page 4: Dr. Impossible slings a blade Pierce’s way, and he blocks it with a forcefield he generates, saying, “Bruce taught me this one.” Kind of funny to think of a guy without electric powers teaching a guy with electric powers how to use ‘em. Note Pierce refers to Batman here as Bruce. So that’s one more name to go on The Really Long List of People Who Know Batman’s Secret Identity. Page 5: Red Tornado visits the grave of Boston Brand, who doesn’t answer Reddy’s calls for him. He begins to suspect that maybe that wasn’t really Deadman who guided him into his new human body after all. Nicely laid out and drawn page here, but a couple of questions come into mind. First, what the hell is Reddy wearing, if he has a human body now? Does he paint his face, head, ears and lips red now, or what? And what’s up with his eyes? We see him with green pupils while suited up, but here his entire eye is green, just as they were when he was still an android. Does he now pop special contact lenses in and out, or what? The other question regards his specially colored narration box—Why is the font on it like that of an old school word processor if he’s human now and no longer a machine? Is it because his thoughts are still those of a machine, or has Meltzer driven letterer Rob Leigh so mad with all these individualized narration boxes that Leigh doesn’t even think this stuff through any more? Page 6: Wow, it’s only the third issue and already we’ve got a Phantom Stranger cameo. Meltzer is not wasting any time at referencing the Satellite Era. Stranger says some pretty cryptic shit, particularly about the balance “of immortality. Of the thirteen.” Hmm, wonder what that’s all about? Page 7: Arsenal, Black Canary and Green Lantern Hal Jordan face off against some orange, yellow, blue and green Tornados, who each apparently have a weather-related power depending on their color. Roy re-caps his part of the last two issues thus far, while Canary notes aloud, “The blue ones do wind.” Actually, they all do wind. Look at their legs; they’re made out of freaking tornados. Page 8: Roy Harper, a.k.a. Arsenal, former sidekick to Green Arrow and former Titan, kicks ass, demonstrating why he’s one of my favorite DC heroes. And then he goes and says, “Crapola,” and I lose about half the respect I have for him. Sigh… Page 9: He follows that up with the line “Yellow one definitely does the sun!” while some kind of blue energy beam emits from the yellow one’s hands. So shouldn’t that beam be colored yellow or orange or maybe red, to indicate light or heat? Why’s it shooting blue energy at him? That doesn’t seem very sunny to me. Arsenal fires nine arrows simultaneously, and he and Canary have a neat back and forth. Page 10-11: Benes gives readers some fan service, with a big close up of Canary pouncing on Yellow Tornado. In narration, Arsenal confesses he was wrong his whole life, that Green Arrow wasn’t the toughtest of the hard traveling heroes after all; Canary was. In a cool seven panel sequence, she now demonstrates her bad assedness by jabbing an arrow into every joint on Yelly’s body until she finds the weak spot. Page 12: New vocabulary word: “Subtalar joint.” Page 13-14: Now it’s Green Lantern’s turn to show off. Wow. Hal Jordan, your name is Bad Ass. Page 15: Oh my God! They’re still looking at pictures! I thought Superman’s post-Infinite Crisis mission statement was to do less thinking and more action, and yet he’s been sitting in this cave for over three issues now (counting the end of #0) looking at glamour shots of superheroes! This is a good page to point out an inconsistency in the format of the book and Meltzer’s novelistic use of multiple points-of-view, which he tries to convey using color-coded narration boxes that more or less match the costume color scheme of the Leaguer doing the narrating. Thus far, we’ve seen both Black Lightning, Red Tornado and Arsenal narrating/thinking to themselves in these boxes. This page starts out with a panel in which both Superman and Wonder Woman narrate/think to themselves. But in the sixth panel, there are three different box colors, one for each of the three sitting around the table. And they speak to one another in the boxes, addressing their sentences to one another and answering each other’s boxes. Since they presumably can’t read each other’s minds (Martian Manhunter being all Skrull-ed out and MIA), we can assume either that a) this is a mistake, and the dialogue was accidentally put into narration boxes instead of dialogue bubbles, or b) Lightning, Reddy and Arsenal were talking out loud back there during their scenes or c) sometimes the color-coded boxes are used to show dialogue and sometimes they’re used to show narration/thoughts. I’m assuming it’s c), which is unfortunate; I have no problem getting the gist of the scene, but it’s unfortunate that such a high-selling book that’s presumably poised to pull in a great deal of new readers (fans of Meltzer, fans of Identity Crisis, new DC readers pulled into the DCU by Infinite Crisis and 52), some of whom may even be new to comics in general (people who can’t get enough of Meltzer’s prose and decided to try out one of his comics, kids who dig Hawkgirl on Justice League and want to try her comic book Justice League adventures), would screw up basic comic book language here. This is Comics Making 101 people, and these are rookie mistakes, not something you’d expect from DC at all, let alone on the relaunched JLoA. Page 16: Aaaand, just to underscore the anything goes approach, here he have dialogue of Superman’s continued in a white narration box, with quotes around the dialogue. For those keeping score, this is the fourth type of format for presenting written information in this book. Page 16: Dr. Impossible demonstrates some teleporting power (or superspeed), then hands Pierce a severe beating. Realizing he’s in the city protected by Hawkman and Hawkgirl, Pierce mutters “Carter…?” when he hears someone flapping his way. So Pierce knows Hawkman’s Golden Age/Post-“Return of Hawkman” secret identity too. Huh. Wonder when that happened? Page 17: Woo hoo! There’s Hawkgirl! So it only took three issues for everyone shown on the first issue’s cover to make an appearance! Take that, New Avengers! Page 18-19: Meltzer and Benes are doing some really nice layouts in this issue, as this 11-panel, two-page spread illustrates. Dr. Impossible calls the mystery villain orchestrating things “Master,” which seems odd, since the mystery villain is most likely an android. Maybe Dr. Impossible is, too? I really like the part where they just throw crumbled pieces of Parasite into the open door on Red Tornado’s body’s chest. Ivo created power-sucking technology in his Amazo android, so what’s he need pieces of a power-sucking villain for? Or is that the secret ingredient in Amazo? Crumbled Parasite bits? In case the clues as to who the mystery villain is weren’t clear enough, Meltzer and Benes make it as obvious as they can in the last panel, in which Ivo pastes two pointy elf ears onto the former Tornado’s body. Yep, it’s Amazo. A villain we haven’t seen since Infinite Crisis earlier this year. And Villains United. And Judd Winick’s “Under the Hood” storyline in Batman. And Young Justice: Sins of Youth, DC: Secret Files and Origins 2000, throughout the entire brilliant-but-cancelled Hourman series and Mark Millar’s fill-in issue during Grant Morrison’s JLA run. Not that he’s over-used or anything. Page 20: Vixen survived. So did most of her top. Lucky for her, this isn’t a Vertigo series, or her top probably wouldn’t have been so lucky. Page 21: Back in the cave, the Trinity are still talking line-up, and finally get around to Cyborg, all agreeing that he’s pretty much a shoo-in. Which is when Pierce, Hawkgirl and the unconscious Trident enter, perhaps ruining Cyborg’s chance of joining the League. Way to go, Pierce. Page 21: Pierce shows us the ack of Trident’s neck, where we see a small, Starro-shaped starfish, presumably doing some sort of mind-control whammy on Trident (so perhaps Starro is the mastermind, not Amazo?). At any rate, the conqueror starfish from beyond the stars hasn’t menaced the JLA for, oh boy, it’s probably been months since the Gail Simone scripted issues of JLA: Classified, in which microscopic Starro’s were used to infect and mind control the Flash and others. And before that, we haven’t seen Starro do that mind-control thing since Morrison re-invented the star conquerors in two different stories during his run. And, of course, Giffen and DeMatteis used the evil Echinoderm during their run on the League, in Justice League Europe.