Marvel's April previews reviewed

AVENGERS/INVADERS #10
Written by ALEX ROSS & JIM KRUEGER
Penciled by STEVE SADOWSKI & PATRICK BERKENKOTTER
Cover by ALEX ROSS
Variant Cover by MITCH BREITWEISER
The true enemy stands revealed and in a twisted past with no order, two teams of heroes make their way under the Atlantic ocean to confront the enemies of freedom who are planning their next move behind a wall built around Europe. But even with the help of Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commandos, plus Black Panther, it may be too late to stop the end of everything.

Oh no, it's winding down already! Here's hoping the same team follows it up with an Invaders/The Twelve 12-parter...



CAPTAIN AMERICA COMICS #1 70TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL
Written by JAMES ROBINSON
Penciled by MARCOS MARTIN
Cover and Variant Cover by MARCOS MARTIN
Sketch Variant Cover by MARCOS MARTIN
Leading off a series of celebratory specials commemorating Marvel’s 70th Anniversary, James (STARMAN, SUPERMAN) Robinson and Marcos (AMAZING SPIDER-MAN) Martin bring you an untold story of the living legend. In the days before he becomes Captain America, a scrawny kid from Brooklyn named Steve Rogers shows the world that you don’t need a super-soldier serum to be a hero. Plus a classic Captain America tale from the Golden Age by Joe Simon and Jack Kirby.
48 PGS./One-Shot/All-New & Reprints/Rated A...$3.99

This actually looks pretty promising: A good writer and a great artist on Captain America story, paired with a Simon and Kirby back-up, in a double-length book for just $3.99. If this is an indication of the direction of the level of quality that can be expected of this “series of celebratory specials,” then I’m genuinely excited about them.

And wow, look at all those swastikas—that makes the awkward partial removal of a swastika in that Wolverine special a few weeks back seem even more perplexing to me.



Ha ha ha ha! Dark Avengers’ Iron Patriot has red and white striped abs!

Um, that’s all. I just thought that was funny.



Rafael Grampa's cover to the last issue of this Dead of Night miniseries featuring Werewolf By Night. Too bad he didn't draw all the covers, and the interiors. That is one nice looking werewolf.


DAREDEVIL NOIR #1 (of 4)
Written by ALEXANDER IRVINE
Pencils & Cover by TOM COKER
Variant Cover by DENNIS CALERO
"LIAR'S POKER," PART 1
The latest addition to Marvel's red-hot Noir line offers a unique spin on the Man Without Fear! Prohibition-era Hell's Kitchen is Kingpin territory, and until now, his only problem has been the masked vigilante known as Daredevil. When gangster Orville Halloran arrives on the scene, fresh from a stretch in Sing Sing and eager to stretch his wings, Hell's about to get hotter. For P.I. Foggy Nelson and his loyal assistant Matt Murdock, it all starts when a desperate woman comes to their office with an irresistible story about her and Halloran. To Foggy, she's a client -- to Murdock, she's enough to make Halloran Daredevil's next target. But Murdock is about to find out that half-truths are poison truths, and that the Kitchen is full of history that will put him on a collision course with both the old Kingpin and the man who wants to replace him.
32 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$3.99

Wait, I thought all Daredevil comics were noir...for, like, the last 25 years or so...?



EXILES #1
Written by JEFF PARKER
Penciled by SALVADOR ESPIN
Cover by DAVE BULLOCK
Wolverine Art Appreciation Variant by TBA
Heroes are being pulled out of the worlds they know- The Beast. The Witch. Panther. Forge. Polaris. All find themselves in a place out of time with a new mission in life. But something seems to have shifted in the mechanics of the universe, things may not be quite what we remember... But one thing we know for certain- BLINK is BACK! Plus 8 pages of Director's Cut Extras!
40 PGS./Parental Advisory ...$3.99

Woah, woah, woah…Written by Jeff Parker? But, what about the new Agents of Atlas series? And Mysterius The Unfathomable? How many Jeff Parker series do you want me to read? Besides, I’m don’t know/care enough about Marvel’s alternate realities to be interested in a whole series about ‘em…and this one is $4 for a 22-page story and “8 pages of Director’s Cut Extras!” Oh Marvel, you know there are no directors in comics books…



Jeph Loeb’s probably the only force on earth that could make me not want to buy a comic book with this cover.



INCREDIBLE HERCULES #128
Written by FRED VAN LENTE & GREG PAK
Penciled by DIETRICH SMITH
Cover by DAVID WILLIAMS
Wolverine Art Appreciation Variant by TBA
A DARK REIGN TIE-IN!
The DARK AVENGERS versus the OLYMPUS GROUP versus Herc & Co! 'NUFF SAID!
32 PGS./Rated T+ ...$2.99

So the Dark Avengers are just a buncha guys wearing the 80’s versions of the New Avengers’ costumes…?


INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #12
Written by MATT FRACTION
Art & Cover by SALVADOR LARROCA
Pepper Potts takes flight! Maria Hill fights back! And Iron Man heads for a Stark Lab hiding somewhere in the briny deep where Norman Osborn dispatches PRINCE NAMOR to take him out. Man oh man is THAT gonna be a fight for the ages. By Matt Fraction and Salvador Larroca!
32 PGS./Rated A ...$2.99

Fraction! Damn you! I just dropped this damn book on account of my hatred of Larroca's art on it, and you have to go and write an issue featuring my favorite aspect of Marvel Comics--people fighting Namor. Damn it.



MARVEL ADVENTURES SUPER HEROES #10
Written by TODD DEZAGO
Penciled by DEREC DONOVAN
Cover by CLAYTON HENRY
"ANT-MAN is On The JOB!!"
Well, he's LOOKING for a job, anyway...But his employment is put on hold when the insidious SANDMAN crosses his path-and ANT-MAN needs to pull out all the stops to defeat the Granular Goon!
And, as ANT-MAN's popularity rises, so too do the suspicions of Vernon Van Dyne...!
32 PGS./All Ages ...$2.99

I really dug the last issue of MASH focusing on Ant-Man, and while this one’s got a different writer—Dezago instead of Fred Van Lente—it sure does have a neat cover.



MARVEL ZOMBIES 4 #1 (of 4)
Written by FRED VAN LENTE
Penciled by KEV WALKER
Cover by GREG LAND
Variant Cover by ARTHUR SUYDAM
The acclaimed creative team behind MARVEL ZOMBIES 3 returns...with another adventure that takes place in the Marvel U! The vampire. The witch. The werewolf. The muck-monster. The devil. They're nobody's idea of heroes, but they're all that stands between our world and an unstoppable apocalypse! They're the new Midnight Sons, and their quest to track down the undead who escaped from A.R.M.O.R. will lead them around the globe—and right to a cruise ship overrun with undead undersea-dwelling cannibals! Can this monstrous team stop the "red tide" before it unleashes untold horror upon the mainland? Not if the Merc With Only a Mouth has anything to say about it! Yes, writer Fred Van Lente and artist Kev Walker—the guys who made IGN.com say “MARVEL ZOMBIES 3 may actually rank as the best in the series”—are back again, unleashing the flesh-eaters for another roller coaster ride of gore, action, gore, thrills, gore and gore!
32 PGS./Parental Advisory...$3.99

Wow, that was fast. If they keep cranking these out at this fast of a pace, they’ll soon reach the humorous level of sequel numbers! I didn’t read all of the first issue miniseries—in fact, I quit after #1 when I realized how expensive it was—but I liked the first issue, and am kinda eager for the trade.

This looks pretty exciting though—it’s got, like, three of my favorite Essential stars on the cover. Even if they are all crappy and Greg Land-y looking. Soooo, who’s the woman supposed to be? Is that Jennifer Kale? Son of Satan’s sister?



PRIDE & PREJUDICE #1 (of 5)
Written by NANCY BUTLER
Penciled by HUGO PETRUS
Cover by SONNY LIEW
IT is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife...
Tailored from the adored Jane Austen classic, Marvel Comics is proud to present PRIDE AND PREJUDICE! Two-time Rita Award-Winner Nancy Butler and fan-favorite Hugo Petras faithfully adapt the whimsical tale of Lizzy Bennet and her loveable-if-eccentric family, as they navigate through tricky British social circles. Will Lizzy’s father manage to marry off her five daughters, despite his wife’s incessant nagging? And will Lizzy’s beautiful sister Jane marry the handsome, wealthy Mr. Bingley, or will his brooding friend Mr. Darcy stand between their happiness? "This project has been like a dream come true for me as a writer and as a former graphic designer—not only am I adapting a book I love, I am doing it in the one forum, comics, where words and pictures carry equal weight." Nancy Butler, two-time RITA winner and multiple RT Reviewer's Choice winner in Regency
32 PGS./Rated T+ ...$3.99

Well jeez Marvel, it sure took you long enough to get on the Jane Austen bandwagon. I think the Austen-related trend in publishing has already climaxed and is on its way down now, but better really, really, really late then never, I guess.

I don’t much care for that cover, even though it’s by Sonny Liew, and artist whose work I really enjoy. If Liew was doing the interiors too, I’d probably end up at least checking out the first issue, even if I don’t normally care for comic adaptations of works of other media (or $3.99, 22-page Marvel comics). This Hugo Petrus character does seem to draw pretty well, but his style isn’t unique enough to make re-reading Pride and Prejudice as a comic book or trade paperback sound like an appealing proposition.


SECRET INVASION AFTERMATH: BETA RAY BILL – THE GREEN OF EDEN #1
Written by KIERON GILLEN
Penciled by DAN BRERETON
Cover by MARKO DJURDJEVIC
SECRET INVASION has ended. The Skrull armies have been routed and destroyed. In the wake of his battle in aid of Thor and Asgard, Beta Ray Bill has departed Earth once more, to bring justice and order to the stars. But when Bill becomes savior of a space-faring alien colony, he'll discover that perhaps – just perhaps -- it's possible to be too much of a hero. Soaring action and adventure starring your favorite horse-faced Demigod of Thunder, by Kieron Gillen (NEW UNIVERSAL: 1959) and Dan Brereton (GOD-SIZED THOR)!

My God, is that a long title. One piece of punctuation per title, guys; that’s the rule! I haven’t been reading any of the new Thor, and never read the Simonson run either, so I know very little about Beta Ray Bill other than the fact that he looks like a goofy bipedal space horse, and yet this still looks pretty appealing to me, if only to see Brereton playing in the Marvel sandbox, and penciling instead of painting.



ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #133
Written by BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS
Pencils & Cover by STUART IMMONEN
The end of an era? The last issue of Ultimate Spider-Man? Peter Parker is Spider-Man no more? Is Spider-Man dead and gone in the events of Ultimatum? This final issue will leave you jaw-on-the-floor shocked at the turn of every page!
40 PGS./Rated A ...$3.99

Woah, woah, woah, wait…what?! They’re canceling USM? Presumably to relaunch it with a new #1? Jesus, that makes it official—the entire Ultimate Marvel line has become the regular Marvel line it was created to provide an alternative to.



Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Oh, um, this is the cover of X-Force. And it is awesome.

A thought that occurred to me while watching the Inauguration today:

Spider-Man must have one hell of a telephoto lens on that camera of his.

This has nothing to do with comics, I just think this is the greatest book cover in publishing history

Click to read the cover copy; that's what makes it.

DC's April previews reviewed

Oh, DC previews, am I glad to see you! An unusual Monday involving extra day-job hours and a visit from a plumber have kept me from my keyboard so long that I was afraid I wouldn't be able to do justice to the very cool small press book I was planning to review tonight. And then I saw you there, on Newsarama.com, just waiting for me to cut and paste bits of you onto my blog, and yell insults and compliments at you while prejudging you based only on a few sentences of information.

January 19th, 2009's Every Day Is Like Wednesday post is saved! And now I have until Thursday to review that very cool small press book...


BATMAN: BATTLE FOR THE COWL #2
Written by Tony Daniel
Art by Tony Daniel & Sandu Florea
Covers by Tony Daniel
With the destruction of Arkham Asylum and dozens of Gotham City's most lethal villains rioting through the streets, it would seem that Nightwing, Robin and their allies have their hands full. But they hadn't counted on the return of Batman himself! But is it really The Dark Knight? If so, why is he acting so strangely? And if not, is this a threat that could mean the destruction of Gotham?

This 3-issue series continues to shock and surprise as the battle shifts to the next level with a face-off and ending that will have everybody talking. Who has earned the right to be Batman? Who thinks they deserve it? Robin? Nightwing? Jason Todd? Who will ultimately win the BATTLE FOR THE COWL?

Oh come on Daniel, you're not even trying. That first half of that first sentence is the exact premise of "Knightfall." Kinda cool to see The Knight and Squire on (one of) this issue's cover(s), but, you know, Tony Daniel.

Oh, by the way, who's that woman with the white fox mask in the lower left corner...?




This new Batman: The Brave and The Bold comic is going to be pretty cool, isn't it?



THE FLASH: REBIRTH #1
Written by Geoff Johns
Art and covers by Ethan Van Sciver
Through the decades, many heroes have taken the mantle of The Flash, but they all ride the lightning that crackles in the wake of the greatest hero the DC Universe has ever known, the man who sacrificed himself to save the Multiverse: Barry Allen!

Following the events of FINAL CRISIS, Barry has beaten death and returned to a fast-paced world that a man out of time wouldn't recognize. Or is it a world that is only just now catching up? All the running he's done before was just a warmup for the high-speed race that he and every other Flash must now run, because even though one speedster might have beaten death, another has just turned up dead! From Geoff Johns and Ethan Van Sciver, the visionaries responsible for the blockbuster GREEN LANTERN: REBIRTH and THE SINESTRO CORPS WAR, comes the start of an explosive and jaw-dropping epic that will reintroduce to the modern age the hero who single-handedly birthed the Silver Age of comics! DC history will be made, and the Flash legacy will be redefined!

I'm pretty torn about this series.

On the one hand, bringing Barry Allen back to life seems like its probably the single worst story idea in DC publishing history, even exceeding bringing Jason Todd back to life. The Todd resurrection is, make no mistake, the previous holder of the single worst story idea in DC publishing history, and while bringing a hero whose career is all about outrunning everything and time travel back to life doesn't seem as dumb as bringing a teenager who was beaten to death back to life via a character literally beating up DC continuity (God, this is a long sentence!), Barry Allen's death is a sort of bright, red line in DC publishing history. "Crisis" was, until it's ill-conceived sequel, the equivalent of the life of Christ in DC publishing history (that is, things happened B.C or A.D., Pre-Crisis or Post-Crisis).

It was also one of the company's ballsiest moves—they killed off one of their biggest characters (even if they left themselves an out), and, story-wise, it worked out just fine. They gambled and won.

I hate to use the term "jump the shark" because I think that term itself has jumped the shark (and it's not like DC Comics is ever a few seasons away from cancellation), but there's really no way to look at this that doesn't seem to deserve being labeled as such.

It does long time story-damage to the DCU, which also translates into long time sales lost (How's the Flash franchise been since DC started relaunching it on a quarterly basis at the end of Infinite Crisis, for example?) for a short-term spike in sales ("No son, not Wally West, the guy from Justice League Unlimited; Barry Allen, the guy from Superfriends, when daddy was a little boy.")

On the other hand, if it's possible to make a Barry Allen-comes-back-to-life-just-like-Hal-and-Ollie story work, Geoff Johns is probably the most likely writer to accomplish that. Ethan Van Sciver is a very good artist, and, while his character designs sometimes look a bit silly, I'd be curious to see how he depicts super-speed at this point in his career (he's changed and grown a lot since he was the Impulse artist).

But then on the other-other hand, Johns has already written a Silver-Age-Justice-Leaguer-that-older-readers-love-and-younger-readers-either-dislike-or-just-plain-don't-care-about-comes-back-to-life story, and it was drawn by Ethan Van Sciver. And this will invariably ship late at some point, so why risk getting wrapped up in it now rather than when the trade comes out. And it will be expensive at $3.99 per 30-page issue. And it has one of those scummy 1-in-25 variant schemes, with both variants by Van Sciver.

So, like I said, kinda torn.



THE FLASH PRESENTS: MERCURY FALLING TP
Written by Todd Dezago
Art by Ethan Van Sciver, Eric Battle, John Stokes, Prentis Rollins and others
Cover by Ethan Van Sciver
In this classic story from IMPULSE #62-67, featuring art by Ethan Van Sciver, Max Mercury discovers that his connection to the speed force has been severed. Now, it's up to Impuse to save his mentor and surrogate father.
Advance-solicited; on sale May 6 • 144 pg, FC, $14.99 US

Speaking of Van Sciver's Impulse...

I think these "presents" titles are kinda lame, as they make The Flash or Justice League or Punisher or whoever sound like a producer or live entertainment venue, but still, here's a nice, affordable collection of Impulse, one of those lighthearted, fun teen comics that went the way of the $2.50 single issue. If I remember correctly, the art inside will vary kinda wildly, with Van Sciver doing his version of Humberto Ramos and Eric Battle being Eric Battle, but Dezago's run on the title was pretty good in general. I assume some of this will be newly relevant to the current state of the Speed Force post-Final Crisis, and thus its getting collected now (and as a Flash trade instead of an Impulse one). That, or DC is just trying to get some more Van Sciver product on the shelves.


THE HISTORY OF THE DC UNIVERSE NEW PRINTING TP
Written by Marv Wolfman
Art by George Pérez and Karl Kesel
Cover by Alex Ross

Don't miss this new printing of the definitive history of the DC Universe. Featuring virtually every character in the DC Universe, this tale takes us from the dawn of creation to the end of recorded history and lays the foundation for adventures to come.
Advance-solicited; on sale May 13 • 104 pg, FC , $12.99 US


Ha ha, "definitive." I wonder how much of this is even in continuity now. Twenty percent? Ten?


JLA DELUXE EDITION VOL. 2 HC
Written by Grant Morrison
Art by Howard Porter, Gary Frank, Greg Land, Val Semeiks and others
Cover by Howard Porter & John Dell
Collecting stories from JLA #10-17, PROMETHEUS #1 and JLA/WILDCATS in Deluxe format, this volume features the Justice League facing off against Lex Luthor's newly assembled Injustice Gang while the fate of the Earth itself hangs in the balance.

Fantastic. It's nice to see JLA/WildCATS collected with JLA proper (I believe it was last collected with Morrison's JLA: Classified "Seven Soldiers" prelude arc, for some reason). I'll likely pass on this, since I have all these books, but I'd be curious to reread the series as its being collected here. I'm also curious to see Greg Land's art back when he was drawing it without so much image reference--or at least the image reference was so subtle that it still looked like he was drawing straight out of his head.

Oh, and if for some reason you haven't yet read these comics, in addition to the WildCATS crossover, the Prometheus vs. the whole JLA two-parter and the one-shot lead in to it, this collects "Rock of Ages," maybe the best arc of Morrison's run on the title. It's especially relevant now, as it was essentially a sort of rough draft for Final Crisis. Darkseid conquering and completely subjugating earth, J'onn J'onnz killed, Batman tortured until he's able to out-will his captors, face down Darkseid and get eye-beamed...it's all in here.


JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #32
Written by Dwayne McDuffie
Art by Federico Dallocchio
Cover by Ed Benes & Rob Hunter
While the team struggles with the aftermath of dissolution, the cosmic force known as Starbreaker sets out to ravage the earth for a hidden source of unimaginable power. But with the team facing its own crisis, who will stand in his way?

Huzzah, an Ed Benes-less issue! Good timing too;I'd hate to see Benes drawing anyone ravaging anything.

Of course, my interest in what used to be my favorite comic book has long since been killed dead, so I imagine I'll pass on this anyway, especially since Benes will still do the cover and probably be back next month anyway.


JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA #26
Written by Geoff Johns
Art by Dale Eaglesham & Nathan Massengill
Covers by Alex Ross
Featuring three painted covers by Alex Ross depicting the entire Justice Society of America! In a very special day-in-the-life story of the JSA titled "Black Adam Ruined My Birthday," the team celebrates the birthday of one of their own – Stargirl! Don't miss this momentous issue.

Retailers please note: This issue will ship with three covers by Alex Ross that can be ordered separately. Please see the Previews Order Form for more information.
On sale April 29 • 32 pg, FC, $2.99 US

Ha ha, I was going to say, "Wow,what a nice cover by Alex Ross," but it looks like DC won't actually be selling that cover. Your $2.99 will only get you 1/3 of the image. Oh comics, how I hate you...


THE LAPIS LAZULI CROWN VOL. 1
Written and illustrated by Natsuna Kawase
CMX. Everyone in young Miel's family has magical powers, but she's not really interested in developing hers. Miel wants to live a more normal life, much to her older sister's disapproval. But when she encounters a boy who needs some help—and who happens to resemble the handsome and beloved young prince of the realm—Miel may just have found the motivation she needs to develop her own special gifts.
Advance-solicited; on sale May 20 • 5" x 7.375" • 192 pg, B&W, $9.99 US • EVERYONE

I've always liked the word "lapis lazuli."



Reminder: Guillem March is awesome.


ROBIN: THE TEEN WONDER TP
Written by Dennis O'Neil, James Robinson, Chuck Dixon, Jim Starlin, Marv Wolfman, Bill Willingham and Geoff Johns
Art by Lee Weeks, Scott McDaniel, Tony Daniel and others Cover by Alex Ross
All of the teenagers who have served as Robin star in this title collecting stories from BATMAN: LEGENDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT #100, NIGHTWING #101, BATMAN #428 and 442, ROBIN #126 and 132 and TEEN TITANS #29.

"All?" Even Stephanie Brown?



SEAGUY: THE SLAVES OF MICKEY EYE #1
Written by Grant Morrison
Art and cover by Cameron Stewart
In 2008 alone, superstar writer Grant Morrison killed Batman, put the entire DC Universe through its FINAL CRISIS and concluded the unanimously beloved ALL-STAR SUPERMAN. But what does a writer who's written every significant Super Hero do when he can create any Super Hero he wants? The answer, of course, is SEAGUY! Morrison (THE INVISIBLES) rejoins original SEAGUY artist Cameron Stewart (SEVEN SOLDIERS) in an all-new adventure starring the cult-favorite character!

In Seaguy's cartoon future world, everyone is a Super Hero and no one dies. It's absolutely perfect...Or is it? In this follow-up to the cult 2004 miniseries, Seaguy resurfaces with a sinister new partner, a hatred of the sea and a rebel restlessness he can't explain. Why are Doc Hero and his ex-archenemy Silvan Niltoid, the Alien from Planet Earth, whispering strange equations? Why is Death so useless? And can that really be the ghost of Chubby Da Choona mumbling uncanny warnings and dire prophecies of ultimate catastrophe?

When the grotesque powers lurking behind the corporation known as Mickey Eye and the Happy Group attempt to erase Seaguy's entire existence, can he possibly get it together in time to save a world so far gone it can't even imagine the horror lying in wait? Find out here in Morrison's own personal reframing of the Super Hero concept for the 21st century.
On sale April 1 • 1 of 3 • 40 pg, FC, $3.99 US • MATURE READERS

Grant Morrison beings the arduous task of redeeming himself after "Batman R.I.P." and Final Crisis. This looks like it will be a hell of a good start on that front.


SECRET SIX #8
Written by Gail Simone
Art by Carlos Rodriguez & Bitt
Cover by Nicola Scott
It's a special double date issue as the surviving members of the Six take a night on the town in that disturbing way that only they can do. It's dinner and a movie with bullets and bloodshed in an all-romance (with violence) issue you won't want to miss! Plus, what does Ragdoll dream about? Um, it's not for the squeamish.

Is this the issue where Deadshot and Catman finally break down and make out? The solicitation sounds promising!

Uh oh, a different art team?! Hopefully it's just a fill-in, as Scott and Hazelwood are one of DC's better teams at the moment.


SHOWCASE PRESENTS: SUPER FRIENDS VOL. 1 TP
Written by E. Nelson Bridwell and Dennis O'Neil
Art by Ric Estrada, Vince Colletta, Ramona Fradon, Bob Smith and Kurt Schaffenberger
Cover by Alex Toth

The superstars of the 1970s animated adventures star in this new, bargain-priced volume collecting SUPER FRIENDS #1-24!
Advance-solicited; on sale May 27 • 448 pg, B&W, $9.99 US

This is the greatest news I've ever heard in my entire life: About 450-pages of Justice League adventures, for $9.99. That's less than two issues of New Avengers and on issue of Tiny Titans.


THE SPIRIT #28
Written by Michael J. Uslan & F.J. DeSanto
Art by Justiniano & Walden Wong
Cover by Brian Bolland
It's Paris in the springtime! Our 3-part revue of The Spirit's finest female foils concludes with the woman who puts the femme in femme fatale, the toast of Montmartre: Plaster of Paris! Where this beauty goes, murder follows en suite!

I dropped this after a few issues of the new, not-Darwyn Cooke creative team's efforts, but I'm pretty curious about what Justiniano's Spirit would look like.



SUPER FRIENDS #14
Written by Sholly Fisch
Art by Scott Shaw! & Terry Beatty
Cover by J. Bone
When the alien Kanjar Ro invades Earth, he freezes all humans so that they won't mess with him – including the Super Friends! What he doesn't know is that he's about to face resistance from their super best friends – the Super Pets!

Yes. Not only do we have a team called "The Super Pets," but its in a comic drawn by Scott Shaw. And nice touch having a Kanga for a Wonder Woman pet; I honestly never thought of that, and I think about super-pets a lot.

Confidential to Jann Jones: I have a proposal for a Legion of Super-Pets miniseries set in the DCU and it is awesome. Call me!



I love you, Art Baltazar.


WARLORD #1
Written by Mike Grell
Art by Joe Prado & Walden Wong
Cover by Mike Grell
At the Roof of the World in Tibet, a team of paleontologists and adventurers has made the find of the century: perfectly preserved dinosaur specimens that appear to have died mere days before! Their expedition takes a deadly turn when they uncover an impossible portal to another world – an unbelievable country at the hollow center of the Earth, the mythical land of Skartaris! But they're not the first surface-worlders to find themselves stranded in Skartaris, and their arrival in his peaceful home triggers an unforgettable new adventure for the hero who has taken the land as his own: Travis Morgan, the Warlord! This new ongoing series marks the return of creator Mike Grell to the fantasy saga that made him famous! Reunite with Tara, Shakira, Tinder and the rest of the cast in a story that continues the adventures of the Warlord but opens up a new era where any reader can jump aboard. Along with Grell's scripts – and lushly painted covers – comes the art of rising star Joe Prado (ACTION COMICS, SINESTRO CORPS SECRET FILES)! DC's finest fantasy franchise is reborn!

I was really rather surprised that DC couldn't make one of their old fantasty series' work in a post-Dark Horse Conan market. I'm not sure how the last attempt at Warlord went, as I skipped it (If I remember correctly, it was a reboot...?), and Claw The Unconquered was a little on the disastrous side (why was it at WildStorm, again?). This attempt looks a little more promising, since Grell is involved, of course it's been a few years now, and Dark Horse has launched a few more Robert E. Howard character comics, so if there was an uptick in barbarian/sword and sorcery interest, I wonder if it's still around...

I think it's time I admit to myself I have a problem...

Another example of the curious phenomenon of swear words in certain comic books

The previously reviewed Shrapnel: Aristeia Rising #1 tells the story of a future, colonized Venus in danger of invasion by the marines, and the citizenry rising up to defend their home planet and government.

There are a lot of swear words in it. I remember coming across "dick," "asshole," "asses" and "shit." (The last one I remember quite clearly, as it was used in a strangely constructed sentence: "This war might'a been thrust on us like stink on shit").

One word you won't see, however, is "fuck." And yet writer M. Zachary Sherman writes a few lines of dialogue in which a form of the word "fuck" is called for—specifically, "fucking"— but rather than actually having his characters say "fucking," they say "effin.'"

Here, for example, is a marine, who's commanding officer has just said, "We're marines, and who can tell me what USMC stands for?" The marine responds thusly:

"You Signed the Mother-effin' Contract, sir!"

Seems strange that the marines would self-censor like that, doesn't it? It's my understanding that the military, they love the salty language.

At the end of the next scene, two miners who have been out drinking and gotten in a bar fight are talking about how things have changed for the worse since the solar war. The male miner, whose name I believe is Jammer, curses the alliance and the marines thusly:

"Effin' alliance, effin' marines..."

Of course, it is the future, so maybe over the decades or centuries "fuck" evolved into "eff." Well, at least it hasn't evolved into "frell" or one of those sorts of made up feature swears...



(Art by Bagus Hutomo and Leos "Okita" Ng)

We're all Batman...in our hearts

If you read any DC Comics, or if you read Newsarama.com, you've probably already seen the above image, a teaser ad created by Battle of the Cowl writer/artist Tony Daniel packed full of little visual clues to upcoming storylines for nerds to obsess over. Dan DiDio unveiled it as a sort of Christmas present around the holidays, but I didn't pay too close attention to it—beyond looking to see if Daniel drew any feet (he did!) and thinking, "Damn, that Two-Face Batman looks kinda cool"—until I got to the end of this week's Final Crisis #6, where it ran across two-pages as a giant house ad.

Upon closer inspection, I noticed something a little...odd about Bruce Wayne (or Dick Grayson?) and Tim Drake (or Damian?) on the far right of the image:


Oh come on guys, you're never going to quash those rumors about your relationship if you insist on all this kinky bandage leash dom/sub fetish play in public!

You know what got me really excited about the near future of the Bat-books though?

This:

Is the robot Tyrannosaurus Rex in the Batcave going to win the "Battle of the Cowl" and get to be the new Batman? Man, no one will ever see that twist coming!

Ladies and gentleman, the president of Friends of Lulu

Friends of Lulu is, in their own words, "a national nonprofit organization whose purpose is to promote and encourage female readership and participation in the comic book industry." Valerie D'Orazio is the group's current president.

In the comments thread to D'Orazio's second post in three days about how terrible something she heard happened in a DC comic book she didn't read was, a commenter asked her why D'Orazio is only complainig about DC all of a sudden (a fact underscored by her contrasting that DC comic book she hadn't read unfavorably with a Marvel comic book she hadn't read yet either (the Obama/Spidey team-up), and trumpeting the fact that Marvel's Wonderful Wizard of Oz apparently "sold out" out the distributor level, which is something that should happen pretty much with every single Marvel book (since they print to meet pre-orders, and don't reveal the the numbers of books they print anyway.



Occasionalsuperheroine poster code-named "Najika":

Hello Val. First time poster, long time reader. I just want to say a couple things and then I'll stop bothering you.

When I first discovered your blog I absolutely loved it. I was just discovering the online comic book feminism community. Your blog was definitely the best. I really liked your insider views too. But the real appeal was how you never failed to call out the big name companies on their crap.

Flash forward a few months and it seemed like something had changed. Instead of calling everyone out on their errors, it seemed like you only called DC out on stuff. This confused me a little. I looked through your blog archives and saw that you used to work for DC and it wasn't pleasant for you.

I can see why an unpleasant experiance with a company would make you be hard on them. After all, you have an insight into them we don't. But I'm still disappointed with the new direction you've taken. It seems to me like you've started to ignore the rest of the industry and focus on DC's mess-ups exclusively. I'm bummed that the take no prisoner feminist views seem to be gone. When Ultimate Wasp met her gory end the rest of the blogosphere called Marvel out on it. Even though people have directly asked you about it in Comments sections you haven't addressed it once. I also have to agree with other commentors when they say you aren't really being fair to DC. They have a great all-ages line and publish lots of great titles that I, as a feminist, love to read.

Of course, this is your blog. If you want to talk about DC instead of feminism that is your complete right. But I'm not sure if I want to read about it. That's all I wanted to say. Thanks for your time.



Valerie D'Orazio, President of Friends of Lulu:

Najika, if you support DC Comics, then personally, I really can't consider you a feminist. Sorry. It's like "yeah, I read about your bad experiences with them. that stuff about sexism. that's too bad. but can you cool it on them? I want to read about feminism, but I don't want to ruin my comic book reading experience."

It's like if you had a horrible sexist thing happen to you at a certain coffee shop. And I stop by, and read the stuff you say about the coffee shop. Now, I consider myself a serious feminist. Ad I DO want to hear your opinions on sexism. But I tire of hearing about that coffee shop. Because I want to buy a fucking cappuccino there. They make good cappuccino, and I don't want to feel guilty about buying it. Now, you might feel offended that I have heard your story, yet not only have patronized the sexist coffee shop -- but had the temerity to tell YOU that YOU should stop talking about how you were hurt there. Because I want to enjoy my cappuccino.

For you to tell me to stop posting about this stuff and post about "feminism" instead -- it's like you didn't read a damn thing I wrote.

Go enjoy your comic books, and enjoy your "feminist" blogs. Hope you find one that hates Dave Sim -- he's such a good, soft target.


Once again:

[I]f you support DC Comics, then personally, I really can't consider you a feminist.


Okay obviously, that’s nonsense, D’Orazio knows it’s nonsense, and anyone who’s ever read her blog knows she knows it's nonsense, and if she stopped to think about what she wrote before she sat in front of her keyboard and started banging on the keys, she wouldn’t have written it.

I don't honestly think she honesty thinks that Gail Simone, Nicola Scott, G. Willow Wilson or Amy Reader-Hadley (just to name the women working on ongoings for DC), Jann Jones, Karen Berger and Shelly Bond (to name some editors whose names I happen to know how to spell) are all anti-woman, to say nothing of the scores of others—men and women—who work for DC Comics in some capacity. I don't honestly think she thinks that anyone who buys and reads DC comics is somehow anti-woman.

But that’s what she said.

Change you can Bee-lieve in

So have you heard of Paste magazine's "Obamicon Me" thing yet? (I know Mike Sterling has).

I suppose it's pretty self-explanatory but, if not, it allows you to upload images and turn them into versiosn of Sheperd Fairey's "Hope" poster. As long as you don't have to draw your own source material, it's very easy. I kinda messed mine up, as I did it in black and white, so I guess the program didn't have enough colors to work with.

This taught me something very important though: There are wa-a-a-a-y too few images of the Red Bee on the Internet. Google Images pretty much just turns up two different Hit Comics covers and a bunch of my crappy drawings of the Bee. I had to draw my own damn headshot because I couldn't find any Red Bee headshots!

DC Comics, this just goes to show that you really oughta publish a Red Bee Chronicles trade soon (But I'll settle for the complete All-Star Squadron and Young All-Stars in Showcase Presents collections...the Bee shows up in there). Please, won't you think of the Red Bee image reference-starved users of the Interent?

Hey Kids! Comics!

(From DC Comics’ Final Crisis #6, written by Grant Morrison and illustrated by J.G. Jones. Re-posted here on EDILW, just so I can have all my scans of Marvel Family gore, violence and crotch shots all collected in one place)

Not comics: Mo Willems has a new book

Mo Willems, the writer/artist responsible for some of my favorite children's books (Don't Let the Pigeon Drive The Bus, the Elephant & Piggie series) has a new book out, entitled Naked Mole Rat Gets Dressed (Hyperion). I wish I could report that it's a great book that you simply must read, but I honestly found it rather disappointing, due in large part to the fact that it has one of the best titles I've ever heard for a children's book that I half-expected the insides to follow suit.

Willems is a pretty great artist, of course, so even his lesser books are always worth checking out. His mole rat design is kinda neat (see the one above), and I really liked the overall design of the book; it's set entirely in naked mole rat turf, and a plain, black line extends horizontally thorughout the wider-than-it-is-tall rectangular book, suggesting underground tunnels. It's a nice bit of suggestion too, because other than that line, and the bits of sand that appear directly beneath characters and objects, the bulk of the pages are empty space. Willems' ability to create characters and suggest emotions in just a few simply lines has always been an extremely impressive, but this is the first of his books I've read in which I've noticed him building a lot out of a very little in terms of the setting.

Some of the standalone images are pretty funny—just the sight of a naked mole rat wearing only socks and breifs and contentedly putting on a pair of pants next to the title, for example—but once you get past the inspired title, there's not a whole lot to latch on to here. (Um, this is a book suggested for readers three and up, and I'm 31-going-on-32, however, so do take this whole post with the appropriate grian of salt; actual children will presumably find a lot more to latch on to than old man Caleb).

This is how the story begins:

There is so much to learn about the fascinating little creatures known as naked mole rats.

But, for this story, you only need to know three things:

1. They are a little bit rat.

2. They are a little bit mole.

3. They are all naked.

So it's off to a great start! There is one exception to item number three, however, and that's, "Wilbur, the naked mole rat who liked to get dressed."

Three naked mole rats walk in on Wilbur, in the middle of tying on a tie in front of a full-length mirror, and they do not like what they see. Clothes are anathema to naked mole rat society, and yet Wilbur loves them. He and his peers lay out their differing points of view over the course of several pages, and they ultimately consult Grand-pah, an old and revered naked mole rat. Grand-pah thinks on the matter for a while, and then tells them to gather all of the naked mole rats together, as he wished to make a proclamation.

The aged naked mole rat arrives wearing clothes, and announces that he had never really thought to try clothes before, but, once he did, he realized there isn't actually anything wrong with clothes, even if they're not for everyone. It all ends with a dance party, and naked mole rat society is changed forever: Some naked mole rats remain naked mole rats, some naked mole rats become clothed mole rats, but all respect each other's choices and have fun dancing together.

It's a nice message of tolerance, and one that's delivered with a light, humorous touch. It may not be Willems' best work, but his merely pretty good is actually pretty great.



To learn more about Wilbur the naked mole rat who likes to get dressed, click here. You can dress Wilbur yourself here. And here's Willems' own blog, which is well worth visiting every once in a while just to see the cool pictures kids give him (Like, check out this Obama).

You know you've been writing about comics too long when

you no longer even need to double check the spelling of Mr. Mxyzptlk's name.

Weekly Haul: January 14th

Action Comics #873 (DC Comics) And thus concludes the “New Krypton” epic, with a final chapter entitled “Birth of a Nation” (oy). It’s a somewhat unsatisfying conclusion, given there’s no real resolution, simply the arrival of a new status quo, which comes pretty quickly on the heels of the new status quo established at the beginning of the story. Now instead of a city full of Superman in the Arctic Cricle, there’s a planet full of Superman in the solar system.

This chapter was written by Geoff Johns, and while it’s fairly Geoff Johns-y, I was impressed in several places with how Grant Morrison-y it felt. There’s Luthor speaking of “the men with kryptonite hearts,” and a damn clever magical tactic for removing the powers from Supermen. (My hat, if I wore one, would be off on that latter bit, Mr. Johns).

On the negative side, the superheroes filling out the squad sent to pacify the Kryptonians seemed poorly chosen (I’m not sure how Stargirl or the Hawks survived, for example, nor why The Thunderbolt couldn’t have stripped the whole population of its powers, but whatever).

And, just to let us know that this is an important story, a minor character from the ‘90s gets killed in the epilogue. Or maybe just super-lobotomized or something—he has two holes drilled into his forehead via heat-vision, which sure looks like a deathblow to me.



Amazing Spider-Man #583 (Marvel Comics) This issue of Marvel’s flagship Spider-Man comic has been getting a ton of mainstream media attention, and has reportedly generated some crazy eBay sales prices and lines out the door in some comic shops. And no wonder—it features a story about the current status of the relationship between Peter Parker and Daily Bugle staffer Betty Brant!

This is also the Obama issue, although the president-elect is relegated to a five-page back-up by Zeb Wells and Todd Nauck. Six pages if you count the cover separating the back-up from the main story, which is the same image on the Obama variant by Phil Jiminez, a crudely drawn image of Obama giving an idiot grin and vanquished political rival John McCain’s favorite hand gesture while Spider-Man takes a picture of the back of his head. Only on the inside version, there’s a red credits box in the lower right hand corner, and, in the upper left hand corner, another box saying, “Marvel Bonus Back-Up Feature!” Ha ha, the book is actually $3.99, so we’re paying an extra buck for these “bonus” six pages.

Marvel Comics is, of course, a business, and slapping Obama’s image on a variant cover and hastily assembling a five-page back-up—overnight, based on the skill evidenced in the final product—to ship the week of the inauguration was a pretty smart business move. In public relations alone, the move was well worth whatever they paid the creators for it.

But it is certainly crass, and more than a little depressing. Or, as Tom Spurgeon noted, gross. I’d encourage you to go read Spurgeon’s paragraph about the book in its full context, but he rightly noted that it would have been nicer “if a company that has concentrated on story the last decade or so to astounding benefit made a solid comic out of the event rather than a kind of cruddy-looking, cynical one.”

Having read those five pages now, “gross” seems like a pretty good way to sum the whole thing up, and I won’t argue with “kind of cruddy-looing” or “cynical” either.

So, here’s the story: Peter Parker, freelance photographer for Front Line newspaper, visits Washington DC for the inauguration, and just as Obama arrives, a second presidential limo crashes into the first, and out steps another Obama. Holy crap, two Obamas!

Wanted criminal Spider-Man swings in to the circle of blasé, unarmed secret service agents and suggests they ask the two Obamas a question only the real Barack Obama would know. As the Obamas argue, it becomes clear that one of them has never heard of the popular American sport basketball, revealing that he thinks it involves a helmet, and is played on a basketball diamond.

The imposter revealed, he transforms back into the Chameleon, and Spidey punches him out, accepts his daps from the real Obama, and then perches atop the Washington monument to complete his photo assignment.

I really like Todd Nauck’s art, but, as I mentioned before, he’s a pretty poor choice for this particular assignment, and his art has never looked worse than under colorist Frank D’Armata, who provides a slick, sick, hyper-real shading that works against Nauck’s cartoonier style.

Wells is a little more hit or miss with me, but in general I’m a fan of his work—he’s got a solid rep as a fun, funny writer, and there’s at least one genuinely clever joke here. But that’s all there really is—a clever joke, a couple of dumb jokes and the end. (I guess I don’t know the Chameleon’s secret origin—is he an alien or something? How come he’s never heard of basketball?).

As Spurgeon noted, this seems like a disappointing cash-in from a company that could do much, much better—hell, they’ve assembled some extremely creative and talented individuals who always do better than this—and give that the Marvel Universe has revolved around the policies of their version of the United States’ federal government for much of the last decade, this story seems extremely perfunctory. Obama co-narrated Secret Invasion #8, for Chrisakes…no one could think of anything better to do with him than this?

It didn’t even rate a 22-page story? I suppose there were some timing issues to be considered—Obama only won the election about two months ago—but this sure felt last-minute rather than last-month. A story about Spidey visiting Washington D.C. and foiling The Chameleon’s plot to impersonate the new president could certainly have been started before the polls closed.

As is, this story seems oddly unimportant, a weird little gimmick attached, ad-like, to the back of a normal Spider-Man comic. It’s basically just one of those old Hostess ads that used to run in comics, only five times longer and 500 times more crass and depressing.

Back to the bulk of the book, this is a little bit better than the similarly disappointing Stephen Colbert/Spider-Man crossover, which at least featured a much better cover. That creatively bankrupt, cynical, “Hey media, look at us! Look at us!” story may have featured a much better cover than this one, but it also came attached to the conclusion of a storyline, so newcomers could be extremely unlikely to know or care what was going on.

Waid and company’s story isn’t necessarily a great jumping on point, but at least it’s a stand-alone, done-in-one competently accomplished, and unlikely to confuse the hell out of new readers the way a story about Venom, Anti-Venom and the Thunderbolts fighting a bullet-ridden Spider-Man might.

Narrator Betty Brant talks about her friend Peter Parker, and how unreliable he is, because he won’t tell her or any of his friends, family or loved ones that he’s actually Spider-Man (he comes across like a bit of asshole because of his insistence of keeping this a secret, even from his aunt, actually). She takes him speed-dating, and she’s sure he’s planning a surprise birthday part for her the following night, but he’s not.

Waid writes nice Spider-Man fight chatter, and handles the soap opera elements of the plot just fine. Spidey seems like an unlikable dick, but that’s hardly Waid’s fault—it’s just where Marvel wants the character right now. Kitson and Farmer are both quite accomplished artists, and while Kitson’s style has never been one that I was overly excited about, there’s nothing technically wrong with it. It looks worse than the last time I saw it, but that has more to do with the coloring, which gives everyone the over-textured look of mannequins squashed into a 2D environment.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go take a shower, as this whole Obama/Spider-Man thing makes me feel really, really dirty.


Booster Gold #16 (DC) Because I demanded it! Time-traveling Booster Gold meets up with Hans Von Hammer, The Hammer of Hell! Well, because I demanded it, or because writer/artist Dan Jurgens also thought it would be cool to work the Enemy Ace into the series. One.

This is part two of a storyline Jurgens is calling “Reality Lost,” and there’s some connective tissue to the previous chapter—including Booster’s little sister and little robot helper looking for him, while he looks for a maguffin—but it also serves as a decent enough done-in-one introducing Booster Gold readers to Enemy Ace, whose Showcase Presents collection I highly recommend.

Jurgens does a pretty good Enemy Ace, even if he never mentions “twin spandaus” or the “skies being the killers of us all” at any point, and together with Norm Rapmund he does a fairly Joe Kubert-ian Enemy Ace. (Check out this preview at Newsarama to see what I mean). Stories like this are what I find so exciting about the premise of the new incarnation of Booster Gold; as a time-traveler, he has access to the entire history of the DC Universe, giving the creators free reign when it comes to stories, characters and settings to play with.


Captain Britain and MI13 #8 (Marvel) This ends the much-too-long story about the demon Plotka making a Mindless Ones factory that runs on the fantasies of human victims. It’s been a quite decent read, but has taken a lot longer than the premise really warranted—in the 1970s or ‘80s, this would have been a one or two-issue storyline, tops. There was no great pay-off at the end either—although Pete Wisdom’s speech about personal responsibility while slashing his way through a series of fantasies using a magic sword was kinda neat—and I would probably be thinking of dropping the title at this point, if it weren’t for the last page.

It features Marvel’s Dracula, dabbing the blood off his stupid-looking moustache while standing on the balcony of his castle on the moon, telling an underling, “get me Doctor Doom.”

So I’m fairly certain Captain Britain and MI13 #9 is going to be fairly awesome.



Final Crisis #6 (DC) The story’s not quite over yet, but I think it’s safe to declare Grant Morrison’s big, DC superhero crossover Final Crisis a complete failure.

Too strong? Let’s check out the first page here. There’s Superman in the first panel, carrying on a conversation with one of the at least three Brainiac 5’s in the 31st century. When we last saw Superman, he was traveling through alternate realities with various versions of himself in the Grant Morrison-written Superman Beyond #1. He was simultaneously in the 31st Century in Final Crisis: Legion of Three Worlds, a story whose only connection to Final Crisis prior to this panel was the fact that it had the words “Final” and “Crisis” in its title.

Superman Beyond #2, which concludes that side story, has yet to see release; Legion of Three Worlds is only about half over. This is set after those stories.

I assume your average reader will have no problem filling in the blanks here—I don’t know if anyone following these stories actually thinks that maybe Superman will die in one of those side stories, for example (And if they do, well, that’s kind of adorable, isn’t it?)—and if this were a writer who wasn’t Grant Morrison, then this might not be that big of a deal.

But this is Grant Morrison. He’s the guy who wrote DC One Million, a company-wide crossover that twisted through hundreds of centuries in time and touched every book DC was then publishing in some form or another, the storyline itself wended through many of them, important story beats happening where they were least expected, and the entire, gargantuan thing synched up just perfectly.

He’s also the guy who wrote DC’s Seven Soldiers event, which when read as intended—i.e. as it came out, I don’t think it works as well experienced in trade collections—was a story in which the events, characters, settings and props of seven individual miniseries moved sideways through one another and linked up just so without necessarily demanding you read each one in any particular chronological order. It was a crossover, but it was a very peculiar sort of crossover, a hands-off one where the characters didn’t even really know they were in a crossover, where only the writer and the reader had the full picture, looking like gods down upon a storyscape the characters couldn’t even comprehend because they were so close to it.

In other words, Grant Morrison knows what he’s doing with these sorts of stories, and he’s not doing it right this time. The trains are not running on time, connections are being missed. Is it Morrison’s fault? DC editorial? Does it matter? Not to readers. In final trade format, maybe this will matter less—will Superman Beyond be collected with Final Crisis, though?—but as experienced as an event, it’s a failure. Hell, it doesn’t even look nice; here the single artist who became two art teams has now become three art teams, all with styles that are less than compatible and aren’t deployed in any logical fashion anyway (I like all three of those team okay, mind you, but my favorite team was that of Doug Mahnke and Christian Alamy, left off the cover credits, who also happen to be the fastest of the teams).

So this is the sixth chapter of the seven-part core series, the darkest-before-the-dawn chapter, and a lot of stuff is happening. There are a lot of cool Grant Morrison ideas in here, there are some fairly bad-ass moments of heroes doing cool things, but it’s all strained through the darkness of a world won by Darkseid which, in different circumstances, might seem a stark contrast to DC Comics in general, but given the dark, dreary tone of the DC Universe over the past two or three years, it just seems stale.

This chapter is exceptionally dark and violent, but DC super-comics have been exceptionally dark and violent for years now; what exactly distinguishes this from your average issue of Teen Titans or Justice League of America?

At any rate, things happen. Braniac 5 shows Superman a god macine, capable of translating thoughts into reality. Supergirl and Mary Marvel-possessed-by-an-evil-New-God fight while arguing over which of them is a slut. J.G. Jones reveals what color panties Supergirl is wearing this issue. Tawky Tawny disembowels Kalibak. Shiloh Norman is a white guy for some reason. Most Excellent Superbat reveals his super-power, and it is awesome. Montoya has bleached her hair light brown and maybe she’s white now too. The Atoms have a cool escape plan. Sivana and Luthor start kicking ass. The Flashes prepare to outrace death itself for, like, the fifteenth time since I started reading comics. Superman goes ape-shit with the heat-vision. And, in biggest event of the book, we see the promised “final fate of Batman,” the true ending of “Batman R.I.P.” and, well, it’s a whole bunch of who cares.

Ready?

So Batman makes his way into Darkseid-in-Turpin’s-body’s throne room. He shoots him with the god-killing bullet that had previously killed Orion, and then gets struck by Darkseid’s omega effect in a two-panel spread (this scene is fairly reminiscent of Morrison’s own “Rock Of Ages” arc in JLA, as elements of Darkseid’s take over of Earth have been; in that story, a future Batman obliterates Darkseid’s moonbase slave factory in front of the evil god, and gets omega beam-ed).

When next we see Batman, he looks skeletal and mummified, and Superman is cradling his body.

Oh my God, is Batman dead?! Well, no. DC will do some crazy shit, but they’re not going to kill Batman off, and there’s very little suspense here, given the circumstance of his eath.

For one, Darkseid’s eye beams have various effects, depending on his whim (and that of the writer). They can kill, they can erase someone from existence, they can resurrect the dead, they can teleport, they can transform a person. So Batman’s not necessarily dead just because he got eye-beamed.

The last time a New God got shot with that very same bullet, we were told it warped time, space and, thus, DC continuity. The last time Darkseid died the same thing happened. So if Batman was dead for a panel or two, he may not even be dead anymore.

And then the sky here is red and full of Earths, as it was before the last continuity reboot in Infinite Crisis; clearly another continuity reboot is on its way, as all those alternate Earths aren’t going to stay in the red sky of the DCU indefinitely. So, well, you get the idea.

So that’s Final Crisis by its penultimate issue: Off the rails schedule and thus plot-wise, full of great work from three different art teams that nevertheless don’t compliment one another, and distinctly lacking in any sort of suspense or much in the way of new ideas. Again, if this was anyone but Morrison, it might not seem so disappointing, but with over 180 pages finished, the most exciting new ideas he’s offered have been the idea of the New Gods as Catholic conceptions of demons possessing people, and the Japanese cosplay version of the Justice League.



Super Friends #11 (DC) I don’t much care for this title, as it’s really and truly a kids comic, rather than an all-ages comics (that is, it’s created specifically for little kids at the exclusion of those who aren’t little kids). That’s not a complaint, mind you, there are certainly more than enough comics written for thirtysomethings, but compared to other Johnny DC titles and the Marvel Adventures line, this one kind of stands out as young-ages instead of all-ages.

This is, in fact, only my second issue of the series, and I blame that entirely on J. Bone, who has produced this fantastic cover of the Super Friends all wearing Batman-ified versions of their costumes. The final cover includes the text, “Who is the myster Bat-Squad!? You won’t believe the answer!” I assume that it’s the other Super Friends, and, guess what, it is! I do believe the answer! You were totally wrong about me, cover blurb-writer!

Also of interest, this is illustrated by Chynna Clugston of Blue Monday, Scooter Girl and Queen Bee. This isn’t her first work for Johnny DC books—I recall her drawing a Mad Mod issue of Teen Titans Go! and at least one issue of the Legion book—but it is certainly the most depressing one.

Clugston is an incredible talent—both as an artist and a writer—and it just bums me the hell out that her talent is being squandered drawing in the style of the Mattel toy line this books based on (a design style that, by the way, I loathe). There are only a few panels in which Clugston’s own art style manages to poke through, mostly in the characters’ eyes and expressions. This is the only character that even looks all that much like she emerged from the end of Clugston’s pencil:
You know what might be a better use of Clugston’s talents at DC? Having her pencil anything. Oh man, could you imagine a Clugston written and drawn Teen Titans series? Even—or perhaps especially—a stand alone, “Sure Chynna, do whatever the hell you want with ‘em,” miniseries?

As for this comic, written by Sholly Fisch, The Super Friends are in the midst of running down the Royal Flush Gang when Bat-Mite shows up, and prevents them from doing so, so that Batman can do it himself.

They argue that it would be harder for Batman to do so by himself, since he lacks their powers, so Bat-Mite takes away all their powers and gives them to Batman. Then Mr. Mxyzptlk shows up, and completely breaks my comic—some pages are apparently missing, and others are printed twice.

The story’s simple enough to follow even with the printing errors though—Mxy causes problems, and at some point Bat-Mite gives the heroes more Batman-like looks, although not the costumes Bone gave ‘em on the cover. Instead, they mostly just get pointy bat-earys, capes and wrist scallops on their old costumes (Aquaman, for example, looks like he’s moussed his hair into bat-ears and tied a blue towl around his neck.

Bat-Mite defeats Mxyzptlk in the usual manner, and then a bunch of other imps show up, leading to a rather inspired conclusion.

I recognized Quisp and Wonder Woman’s leprechaun friend there, but I have no idea who that Flash imp is—the tall one with the glasses and the lightning bolt on his chest.
Anyone out there on the other side of my computer screen know?

There are also some dancing puppets, which Aquaman demonstrates. Step four is “Now Bat-Mite and Mister Mxyzptlk are ready to make mischief—or just do a dance!

Once completed, they look like this:
I have no idea how Aquaman fit them on over his big, heroic fingers. I had to widen the holes significantly, and I could still barely get them on farther than my knuckles. And I have dainty little blogger hands.



Trinity #33 (DC) This week, twenty-two pages of treading water. Back-up pencil art by Scott McDaniel.

A quick word about a comic I didn't read today

I gave Faces of Evil: Prometheus a flip-through at the shop today. The Grant Morrison JLA run that spawned him remains one of my favorite comic book reading experiences, and I was kinda curious how DC planned to rehab the character after he was so poorly written in Batman: Gotham Knights and subsequent appearances. Essentially, he went from Morrison's conception as a kind of reverse Batman (criminal parents killed by cops, swears vengeance on the forces of law and justice) with Matrix powers (can download skills directly into his brain) to a run-of-the-mill henchman working under the Jeph Loeb-created evil plastic surgeon Hush.

What I saw was a pretty lame attempt at restoration by writer Sterling Gates—there were two Promethei, the original badass one and a more incompetent imposter—and some decent enough art by Federico Dalbochio. So whatever, a pretty run-of-the-mill, not terribly intersting looking comic book.

And then I noticed Anima was in it. I've mentioned her at least once before on EDILW, but for those of you unfamiliar, she was a teenage runaway character heavily influenced in design, fashion and tastes by the popular "alternative" music of her mid-90's origin. She debuted as part of DC's throw-a-bunch-of-new-heroes-at-the-wall-and-see-what-sticks "New Blood" event. She was one of the more sucessful characters from the event, earning a solo series that lasted 16 issues (two more than Gunfire, nowhere near as many as Hitman).

It wasn't the greatest book, and swathes of it don't hold up very well today, but I really liked it while it lasted, and, even looking back today from a 30+ year old's eyes, there are still a lot of admirable things about it. It tackled some tough issues—the heroine's best friend was a lesbian with AIDs, for example—in a way that was lightyears more subtle and effective than what you get in your modern Judd Winick comic.

Speaking of Judd Winick, he pulled Anima out of limbo to have her brutally killed alongside a bunch of other minor characters he didn't create in 2007's Titans East Special #1 (Check the comments section at that link for a few word's from one of Anima's creators about her origins).

So I was pretty surprised to see her in this book, being brutaly killed again.

I didn't follow Winick's new Titans series, because it was a Judd Winick Titans series, so I guess maybe Anima and all those other characters weren't actually killed-killed, just really, really, really, really badly hurt. Well, if Winick didn't finish her off, it looks like Gates does so here—as she gets completely cut in half.

So did DC pluck a minor character forgotten by all but a few fans, violently kill her off to show how bad-ass a villain was and motivate some other heroes to ge revenge in one book, forget about her for a year or so, and then bring her back to violently kill her off again to show how bad-ass another villain is...?

If not admirable, its at least endearing the way DC wholeheartedly embraces its decadence, isn't it?